Joke Thread
Just heard this one.
Q: What do a burnt pizza, a pregnant woman, and a frozen beer have in common.
A: Someone forgot to pull it out.
Q: What do a burnt pizza, a pregnant woman, and a frozen beer have in common.
A: Someone forgot to pull it out.
"I need to update this forum software so we can have a "like" button! I would like Davest's post over and over!" -Vicky
Thieves robbing a cheque cashing business were left stranded when someone stole their getaway car while they were inside robbing the business.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/cr ... r-AA1lCO6p
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/cr ... r-AA1lCO6p
Involuntary Muscle Contraction
Professor Higgins at the University of Sydney was giving a lecture on 'Involuntary Muscle Contractions' to his first year medical students. Realising this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly. He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, 'Do you know what your arsehole is doing while you're having an orgasm?'
She replied, 'Probably out fishing with his mates!'
It took 45 minutes to restore order in the classroom.
Professor Higgins at the University of Sydney was giving a lecture on 'Involuntary Muscle Contractions' to his first year medical students. Realising this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly. He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, 'Do you know what your arsehole is doing while you're having an orgasm?'
She replied, 'Probably out fishing with his mates!'
It took 45 minutes to restore order in the classroom.
- WalterB
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I stopped at a bar yesterday. There were three plus-sized women sitting at the bar chatting. They sounded Scottish. So I walked up to them and said, "Afternoon, lassies. Be ye from Scotland, maybe?"
One of the4m took great umbrage. "It's Wales, you idiot! It's WALES!"
Well, obviously I offended them, so I apologized. "Please, I'm really sorry. What part of Scotland are you whales from?
Doctor says I can probably go home day after tomorrow.
One of the4m took great umbrage. "It's Wales, you idiot! It's WALES!"
Well, obviously I offended them, so I apologized. "Please, I'm really sorry. What part of Scotland are you whales from?
Doctor says I can probably go home day after tomorrow.
I can resist everything except temptation.
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The band Winger had a song that went something like she's only 17 but she's old enough for me, boy things have changed over the past 30/40 years or so... lol... now they still sing this song in concert, but they say she's 53 but she's young enough for me...... hahahaha...
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Maybe the lyrics should go "she's 53 but not too old for me.."?stickyvicky wrote: ↑January 29th, 2024, 4:42 pm The band Winger had a song that went something like she's only 17 but she's old enough for me, boy things have changed over the past 30/40 years or so... lol... now they still sing this song in concert, but they say she's 53 but she's young enough for me...... hahahaha...
- stickyvicky
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That's exactly what it says, sorry that was a typo!
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Reminds me of an old Jeff Dunham joke. 'Some women age like fine wine. My wife ages like milk.'
"I need to update this forum software so we can have a "like" button! I would like Davest's post over and over!" -Vicky